Once in a life of a muslim woman....

In response to:getting it together

2009-09-02T14:24:38+02:00

My opinion is that things aren't that pink between you. You should probably try seeing a family therapist or something that can actually help your relationship. Don't be afraid to ask for help if you want to save your marriage.
_____________________________________
Birmingham Home Insurance

In response to:Arranged Marriages

2008-11-24T13:35:25+01:00

If you know married couples with problems send them to a marriage counselor. Maybe they will stand a chance in the face of destiny.

In response to:eastenders

2008-10-13T05:10:59+02:00

God, you have come so far ... PLEASE for the sake of your daughter do not get back together with that abusive husband of yours. For the sake of your daughter, give her the example of a strong woman who looks out for what is best for the family, which includes NOT staying married to an abusive partner. If you can't find a man who is not abusive, it is better to have no man at all. It may be terrifying to have to live on your own, be strong and independent and not rely on a partner, but it is a far better example for your daughter than a woman who exposes her daughter to the abuse and control of a man and just "ignores" abuse the way your mother recommends (your father is still controlling, is he not?). You and her will be SO much happier and healthier without him, are you willing to give that up when you instinctively know it is right, because your religion, your mother, your society, tell you to stay with him?

In response to:Sticks and Stones may Break my Bones....

2008-10-13T04:29:40+02:00

The answer to your dilemma lies in the one thing that everyone; your mother, your religion, your society will tell you not to do: and that is to permanently end a relationship with someone who does not treat you with respect. Until you allow yourself the right to take this power, which is your due, you will always feel like a wimp. A good and dutiful wimp, an obedient wimp, but a wimp nonetheless.

In response to:eastenders

2008-09-23T19:51:06+02:00

The overwhelming majority of people are not paedophiles , though of course a small minority are , so I can understand parents having those fears .

In response to:ramadan

2008-09-15T22:53:22+02:00

Thanks for explaining about Ramadan ; for how many days does it last ?

In response to:Arranged Marriages

2008-09-14T23:38:58+02:00

Hi!

My name is Mansi and I am an intern for Dr.Robert Epstein. He is currently researching involving arranged marriages. Hence I was wondering if you knew of any couples who have had an arranged marriage and would like to answer few questions. Please note, that I am only looking for couples that have had successful arranged marriages. If so, then please contact me at mansithakar@gmail.com.
Thank you for your time. I look forward to hearing from you.
Sincerely,
Mansi

In response to:mind games

2008-09-13T22:17:51+02:00

I'm just glad he's already there. Cos if he'd been planning it and hadn't gone yet, then came to collect N ....

In response to:mind games

2008-09-13T21:43:10+02:00

Men are far too good at playing mind games!

In response to:Chocolate

2008-09-11T15:21:32+02:00

Hi-hope everything is going OK. Peacocks have some great maternity clothes, great value and very good quality. Every little helps etc!

In response to:shattered

2008-09-10T20:55:53+02:00

That would be good if u found a smaller place at least it would be one thing not to worry about,gettin the money together for the rent,no wonder ur exahsted u are probably emotionaly drained as well, if he is away at least u will get some peace n quiet. :) x

In response to:fasts and stuff

2008-09-10T20:43:24+02:00

I have known what Ramadan is for some time now. But what I have never understood is, the purpose of it.
Would you care to shed a bit of light on the subkect for me please?

In response to:shattered

2008-09-10T20:28:49+02:00

He should be paying maintenance for N, that would help a great deal. Contact the CSA?

Glad he hasn't gone to Libya with N. I was worrying about that xxx

In response to:humph

2008-09-08T22:09:40+02:00

I must confess to having laughed while reading some of that , and Trina's comment - not that it's not very serious , it is , but a sense of humour can sometimes help ?!

£20K is ridiculous ! , maybe a quarter , at most half of that , only if he agrees to sign a legally binding , mutually acceptable agreement ,

Best wishes , M .

In response to:humph

2008-09-08T21:14:05+02:00

The guy is derandged obviously, what a cheek to ask you for anything, he's not fit to even wipe your arse! sorry but it's true, I know u can't curse cause its Ramadan so i'll do it for u :)) Hope u and N are okay. :) xxx

In response to:humph

2008-09-08T20:45:02+02:00

That stuff he's doing is ridiculous! Does he really think you will want him back when he's behaving like that?! Surely he can see that you've put your foot down and won't put up with being treated like rubbish. No need to answer all those :))

(some) MEN! :roll:

{{{hugs}}}

In response to:islamic extremism

2008-09-02T19:58:02+02:00

The press have so much to answer for. Mind you, so do this government, who throughout their tenure have reacted to any old rubbish in the media in their usual knee-jerk way. What makes it worse for me is that there seems to be no recourse to an apology, no chance for others to have their say. I personally think it is racism in other forms, it is certainly xenophobic.

In response to:islamic extremism

2008-09-02T19:43:25+02:00

I totally agree with you there, its just awful the way that asylum seekers are treated, espeically consdering the horrors they have already faced. Anything for a good peice of gossip, thats what the media sharks love.

In response to:islamic extremism

2008-09-02T19:41:33+02:00

Your'e right, it is predominantly Islamic extremisn that gets reported, as well as a disproportionate amount of negative press generally. Bush and Putin are extremists, but are allowed to carry on, though not for much longer. To me, the negativepress for Islam generally is analogous to the press given to asylum seekers, refugees, and migrants generally, most of which I find disgusting.

In response to:capital punishment

2008-09-02T13:30:26+02:00

hi friend how are you? hope you are fine now?

In response to:capital punishment

2008-09-01T19:27:42+02:00

thanks for the comment, will try :0)

In response to:capital punishment

2008-09-01T19:27:11+02:00

no hes not living with me. He just comes back in the weekend to see N. You;re right, I just have to make him look like a mad man, then thats the only way I think I can get out of this one, I hope I won't even have to lie then, people would be so outraged that it would backfire. thanks for the comments

In response to:capital punishment

2008-09-01T19:24:52+02:00

thanks hun, I'll survive, just have to be on my guard. Its not been an easy ride...

In response to:capital punishment

2008-09-01T19:23:01+02:00

thanks for your support, not always doing the right thing though... making serious long term decisions so hard at the moment....

I think Ihave to wait and see how things pan out in the long term

In response to:capital punishment

2008-08-30T00:31:28+02:00

Just to add that his calling you a 'dead woman walking' sounds frighteningly like a threat , to be taken seriously , and possibly reported to the police ?

In response to:Arranged Marriages

2008-08-28T12:03:16+02:00

rachel,

I'd like to take part, i have some experience about arranged marriages, if you want, drop me an email at gaf.akash@gmail.com.

Cheers

In response to:capital punishment

2008-08-28T05:37:56+02:00

As your story revealed the facts. Most important thing is to protect yourself first. Try to take the opinion of Doctor on this issue. Just try to forget your past & try to remain in present.

In response to:capital punishment

2008-08-27T23:33:06+02:00

Is he back living with you ?
Yes , start to 'open up' to your family that his unpredictable , irrational , delusional behaviour has been gradually becoming far worse than ( because you did'nt want to worry them ) you've ever told them before .
If or when he comes up with the 'abortion' story you could even claim that he's 'got a thing about' women and abortions and that he's made similar wild , unsubstantiated claims against other women .
Do'nt think of it as lying , just imagine you're auditioning for an acting role , for the sake of you and your daughter's future peace and happiness .
And to 'act' well you have to really get 'into' the role , convincing yourself of the truth of it while you're playing the part , even though behind that you really know it is'nt real .
It's hard to know to what extent Islam is or is'nt a harsh , cold , brutal and unforgiving doctrine : I guess that's all down to interpretation .
Good news about the car ; Your parents obviously value and love you , and I so hope I'm right in believing that even if they did know of your once having had an abortion they'd be understanding and forgiving and continue to love you nonetheless , but you're probably right that it's best not to take the chance ,
all the best ,
- Martin .

In response to:capital punishment

2008-08-27T20:45:35+02:00

I really really hope you are going to be ok.
Although i dont comment, i DO read your blog and i cant believe what he is putting you through. Best of luck with your plan and i hope all turns out well
xx

In response to:capital punishment

2008-08-27T20:26:56+02:00

So much for all his big talk about wanting you back :|

Some men take so long to grow up. You are definitely doing the right things here xxx